No incentive to be a good person.
So I had this really weird dream last night.
It started out in the kitchen of le Chateau, where I was frying up some bacon.![[profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
evilfb was making a PB&J, & was lecturing me on the horrors of eating poor helpless animals for food. Gentle readers, evilfb is by no means a vegetarian. If he were to lecture me on anything regarding bacon, it would probably be on why I should double the amount I was making so he could have a full share of the yummies. But I digress. In my dream he started out as an advocate of vegetarianism.
funkyplaid walked into the kitchen and, citing the old adage "you are what you eat", pointed out that pigs are more intelligent than peanuts, making bacon a better food choice than a PB&J. After all, if you are what you eat, you should eat intelligent things, thus becoming (by some strange osmotic process) more intelligent yourself. At this point, I suggested that by that logic, we should become cannibals, because (most) people are more intelligent than pigs.
evilfb, who quickly abandoned vegetarianism & jumped right onto the cannibalism bandwagon, proposed that we would have to be very selective about who we ate. You are what you eat, after all. So we decided that we would start by eating a Berkeley professor or two - bound to be highly intelligent! But then we stopped to consider - is intelligence the only selection factor we should be considering? If we are planning to better ourselves through cannibalism, should we perhaps consider other factors as well? What about only consuming very attractive people? Or very successful & wealthy people? Then I had a flash of insight: we should only eat GOOD people, very altruistic people - that way, we would also become good people!
At this point, the three of us decided that we should aim for the top. Who are the best people, the most altruistic? Nobel Peace Prize winners! That's right, we decided we needed to eat Nobel Peace Prize winners. But then one of us came up with an even better idea - what if we ran a contest in which the competitors would do their best to prove that they were the most altruistic person in the world. The catch? The contestants would KNOW going into the contest that the WINNER would be eaten by a whole bunch of other people, all of whom were seeking to become better people. What could be more altruistic than agreeing to be eaten for the betterment of humanity?
All I can say is, thank goodness the dream ended there. I would not have been happy if we had actually acted upon our plans. Cannibalism is not cool, not even in a dream.
It started out in the kitchen of le Chateau, where I was frying up some bacon.
evilfb was making a PB&J, & was lecturing me on the horrors of eating poor helpless animals for food. Gentle readers, evilfb is by no means a vegetarian. If he were to lecture me on anything regarding bacon, it would probably be on why I should double the amount I was making so he could have a full share of the yummies. But I digress. In my dream he started out as an advocate of vegetarianism.funkyplaid walked into the kitchen and, citing the old adage "you are what you eat", pointed out that pigs are more intelligent than peanuts, making bacon a better food choice than a PB&J. After all, if you are what you eat, you should eat intelligent things, thus becoming (by some strange osmotic process) more intelligent yourself. At this point, I suggested that by that logic, we should become cannibals, because (most) people are more intelligent than pigs.evilfb, who quickly abandoned vegetarianism & jumped right onto the cannibalism bandwagon, proposed that we would have to be very selective about who we ate. You are what you eat, after all. So we decided that we would start by eating a Berkeley professor or two - bound to be highly intelligent! But then we stopped to consider - is intelligence the only selection factor we should be considering? If we are planning to better ourselves through cannibalism, should we perhaps consider other factors as well? What about only consuming very attractive people? Or very successful & wealthy people? Then I had a flash of insight: we should only eat GOOD people, very altruistic people - that way, we would also become good people!At this point, the three of us decided that we should aim for the top. Who are the best people, the most altruistic? Nobel Peace Prize winners! That's right, we decided we needed to eat Nobel Peace Prize winners. But then one of us came up with an even better idea - what if we ran a contest in which the competitors would do their best to prove that they were the most altruistic person in the world. The catch? The contestants would KNOW going into the contest that the WINNER would be eaten by a whole bunch of other people, all of whom were seeking to become better people. What could be more altruistic than agreeing to be eaten for the betterment of humanity?
All I can say is, thank goodness the dream ended there. I would not have been happy if we had actually acted upon our plans. Cannibalism is not cool, not even in a dream.
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I see it as a reality show. People would be more likely to be eaten if it is the final prize on a reality show.
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And yet, the irony of it is, by eating good people, you become good people, and yet, is eating people in and of itself not good? Have you cancelled goodness out? Or does it create an internal psychological feedback loop that drives you mad with goodness?
And see, conversely, someone would ultimately hit on the idea to consume purely bad people- maybe they'd eat their way through a prison's Death Row inmates, ultimately becoming a supremely evil being. And then that person would be destined to fight someone who would have to eat hundreds of good people to match their unbound evil, and then...
I am so writing this story.
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(Fixing the quote)
ROTFLMFAO
I had a wonderful Sociology 101 instructor who started a lecture about mores with a hypothetical question about cannibalism. I was the only person who raised my hand when he asked if anyone would be willing to go along with the idea of consuming human flesh and meat. More for the sake of playing into the argument, and starting conversation than any desire to eat another human being. It's probably one of the biggest taboos of civilization.
I think I just have an effed up sense of humor. What do you say when surrounded by a group of cannibals?
EAT ME!!!
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Well, good table manners make good dinner partners, I guess.
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Silence o' the Lambs
Hannibal
The Cook, the Thief, His Wife, and Her Lover
Delicatessen
Wendigo
Alive
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Read the LAST sentence of the post & revise your movie recommendations accordingly kplzthx.
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http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a3_104.html
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And here I only dreamt about eating bagels last night. Clearly I'm destined to be someone with only the smarts of wheat. Maybe THAT's why vegetarianism hasn't caught on more broadly. We're too dumb to think of how to market it better...
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Fairy fruit bats - taste great but less filling