Bank of America is too big to fail and/or care.

When Bank of America announced that they were going to start charging $5/month to use their debit cards, hotpantsgalore & I decided that was the final straw & that we needed to move our business elsewhere. We researched credit unions & set up an account with Texas Dow Employees Credit Union. So far, they are great.

Throughout the month of November, we slowly disentangled ourselves from BofA. I moved my direct deposit early in the month. Then we started shifting automatic bill payments. We looked for websites where our BofA debit card information was stored, & made the necessary updates. On Tuesday, I thought we were finally finished with the process, so I closed the BofA accounts for good.

Or so I thought.

But it turns out that, like many evil things, our Bank of America account was quite difficult to kill. This morning, I got a text message notifying me that my latest expense check (for $49) had been deposited in my Bank of America account. This was surprising on two fronts: 1) I thought I had switched my URS payments to the credit union; & 2) I didn't think I had a BofA account any more. Some quick questioning at work revealed that URS makes you change your SALARY direct deposit & your EXPENSES direct deposit separately. OK, thanks stupid corporate behemoth! I made the proper updates, & then took off to the bank at lunch. I explained the situation to a BofA representative, who told me that because a deposit came in, BofA just assumed I wanted the account re-activated. I informed her that such an assumption was incorrect & asked her to cash out the account & close it (again) (I had just done that two days prior). She did so, but only gave me $33.

"The expense check that was deposited was for $49. Why did you only give me $33?"
"Well, since the checking account no longer has a direct deposit associated with it, you were charged a monthly maintenance fee of $12."
"But the check that came in was FROM a direct deposit."
"But it did not amount to more than $250/month, which is the minimum to avoid the monthly maintenance fee."
*long staredown*
"You realize," I said in my calmest, most polite voice, "that this sort of thing is exactly why I am trying to leave your bank, right?"

Finally - after checking that I had maintained a sufficient direct deposit for the entire time I had the account open, & realizing that my last SALARY direct deposit had occurred exactly two days before the start of the current billing cycle, she relented & refunded the fee.

"So, $33 plus $12 equals $45. What happened to the other $4?"
"There was an online purchase made from iTunes."

A little investigation revealed that this was a legitimate charge originating from hotpantsgalore. But then I had a nasty thought.

"What would have happened if that purchase had come into the bank, & my account had NOT just had money deposited? What if the account was zeroed out?"
"We would have assumed that you meant to re-activate the account, & we would have processed the transaction."
"Let me guess... then you would have charged me $35 for insufficient funds, right?"

She looked abashed, but nodded in the affirmative. I worked with her a little bit more, ensuring that both debit cards associated with the account were completely deactivated & that we wouldn't accidently signal to BofA to re-open the account by making a Kindle purchase, or buying a Christmas present off of eBay, or.... I don't know, auto-paying the newspaper subscription. What I don't understand is why cancelling the debit cards didn't happen automatically when I closed the associated checking account!

Anyway, while I was dealing with my situation, I overheard another customer hashing it out with a representative over a bunch of fees she had been charged. When I left the bank, that other customer was getting into her car. I said, "I'm sorry, but I couldn't help overhearing you... would you like me to give you directions to the credit union I just joined? They're right up the street."

She took me up on it. Another new customer at TDECU.